You will never know - more poetry!

You never say you're proud of me...

You never say you want to be with me...

You never say you need me...

For something other than physical needs...

I just want to hear from you that you are proud of me...

I just want to hear from you that you think what I do is good, meaningful, worthy...

I never hear you say that...

And that hurts...

You will never know how much it hurts...

Because you never ask...

Because when I try to tell you, you walk away...

You will never know how I really feel...

Amanda Newton, April 4, 2011

More poetry...Another Lifetime

So these two poems were inspired from my novel I'm in the middle of writing...these two poems are the two different views from the protagonist and the antagonist characters...hope you enjoy!

(HIS VIEW)
Do you know what I feel?
Do you feel it too?
Why have we said nothing but our looks say 1000 words?


We will never know how we feel about each other.
If this was another lifetime perhaps we could explore it
But sadly we will never know how we feel.


When I see your smile, my heart melts
But when I see you with him, my heart breaks
Mainly because I know you will never be with me,
It would be unfair for me to wish you anything but true happiness,
I want you to be happy.
But I want you to be happy with me.


I need to love you.
I need to be with you.
I don't know if I can make you happy
But I truly wish we could find out


We will never know
We must meet in another lifetime to know
Exactly what we could have.


Copyright August 2011


(HER VIEW)

Do you know what I feel?
Do you feel it too?
Why have we said nothing but our looks say 1000 words?


We will never know how we feel about each other.
If this was another lifetime perhaps we could explore it
But sadly we will never know how we feel.


I get sad when I hear you talk about another woman,
Mainly because I know you will never hear you say this about me
But it would be unfair for me to wish you never find someone to make you happy
I want you to be happy.
I just want you to be happy with me.


I don't know what real love is anymore.
I need to be loved.
I don't know if you can fulfill that for me
But I truly wish we could find out.


We will never know
We must meet in another lifetime to know
Exactly what we could have.


Copyright July 2011

More poetry...TREES

My mom said I need to share more of my writing...so here it is...I admit I am a pretty "dark" writer...I don't like yucky-love-stuff poetry or "uplifting" poetry...some was written when I was going through some "stuff" in college...consider this a warning!

I am a tree

Whose leaves and beauty have been stripped away

I am no longer what I used to be

I stand, here in teh dark,

Just waiting for the axe to appear

This abrupt end would leave room

for other, younger, more beautiful trees to grow

There would be fresh faces,

A beauty extraordinaire

No more dismal doom and wasted time

I know it's only fair.

Written in 1998 Emmanuel Bible College

Some Poetry...

The Girl You Cannot See

I am the girl you cannot see

There's more to me than meets the eye

Under all the superficiality

I try to be me but it's very, very hard

I am unable to see past all the pain and hurt and disgust with myself

so I cannot love another

The plan for me is so unclear and I cannot see the path ahead

But hopefully, it will be revealed all in due time

Yet I live each day as the girl you see on the outside,

but strive unrelenetlessly to be the girl you cannot see.